


The Benefits Of Having A Werewife

by Immortal_Enby_Archivist



Category: The Penumbra Podcast
Genre: Canon Nonbinary Character, Established Relationship, Fluff, If you recognise the magic cloak as an element from Once Upon a Time no you didn't, Juno Steel Has a Thing For Teeth, Juno is a werewolf, No Angst, Nureyev is a vampire, Other, POV First Person, POV Juno Steel, They play fetch that's it that's the fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-19
Updated: 2021-01-19
Packaged: 2021-03-17 06:15:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,149
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28844424
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Immortal_Enby_Archivist/pseuds/Immortal_Enby_Archivist
Summary: Juno Steel is a werewolf. Like most werewolves, he has his needs. Sometimes those needs involve getting his vampire lover to play fetch with him.
Relationships: Peter Nureyev/Juno Steel
Comments: 2
Kudos: 47





	The Benefits Of Having A Werewife

**Author's Note:**

> No cw apply

There are many joys in life, but none of them can quite compare to running in the woods under a full moon. Nothing but the wind in your ears, leaves crunching under your paws, and a distinct feeling of freedom.  
My name is Juno Steel. I'm a werewolf. People tend to assume that it automatically makes me a threat, but really, I just want to run at night and howl at the moon.

I stopped to take a breath under a tree, panting lightly with my tongue hanging from my lips. That's when I felt fabric dropped on me from above. I yelped, feeling my body turn back to human. There was only one person who knew where I hid my magic cloak and was stupid enough to use it without trying to kill me.

"Nureyev." I growled, standing up and fastening the clasps of the cloak.

My ears perked up when Nureyev dropped from a branch with a soft thud, followed by a low chuckle. "Lovely seeing you here, Juno. What are the odds?"

"I go through this part of the woods the same day every month, at roughly the same hour." He feigned complete shock and I groaned loudly. "Whatever. I was actually kinda busy before you showed up, so unless you got something to say, it would be nice if you could leave."

Nureyev leaned against the tree, bringing a hand to his chest. "Why, you brute. You cruel calloused lady. And here I was, bringing you a gift-" 

"Nureyev..."

"-hoping that we could bury the axe and spend some time together again - it has been too long since we last hung out, you know?"

"It's been three days."

"Three days of endless suffering, you heartless monster. But, I suppose, if you don't want me to be around, I will do as you ask and leave. Oh, and of course I'll take my gift with me."

"That's all nice and good, Nureyev, but don't you think you're being a little-" I followed his movements and all of a sudden it was hard to think straight. He pulled out a stick from his pocket. Long and sturdy, it was the kind of stick a 120 pound wolf could safely chew on without it breaking. I grabbed my tail to keep it from wagging. _"Oh."_

"So I take it you do want me to stay, hm?"

"Damn, you should have opened with that." My fingers were already working on the clasps of my cloak, tugging it open with impatience. "Alright, you can stay. But only if you don't hold back. I know how strong vampires can be, and I don't like doing this with you if you don't put in some effort."

Nureyev laughed, in that deep, soft way that warmed my heart every time. "Juno, you don't have to dance around the correct term, you know. What you're doing with me is _playing_. We're playing catch, and that's not something to be ashamed of."

As soon as the first hint of condescendance seeped into his words, I growled and turned away, holding the cloak together with one hand.

"Besides, I've been talking to Rita, and she thinks that any form of playing is beneficial to-"

"Fine, fine, goddamn it, I want you to throw the stick very far when we play catch. Satisfied?"

I turned back around to the sight of a gloating, sharp smirk. "For the time being. Now do we want to start, before the Sun rises?"

I rolled my eyes once, but didn't waste any time shedding the cloak. I grunted softly and exhaled. By the time I inhaled, I was back in wolf form, and I temporarily forgot what I was supposed to do.

I'm not saying that I get stupider in wolf form. Sasha actually came up with a theory that all werewolves in their animal form prioritize their instincts over their rational brain. But all I know is that whenever I turn into a wolf when Nureyev is around, I end up jumping on him and licking his face. This time was no exception.

"Woah, okay, Juno! Yes, it's me, yes, you love me very much, darling, you're heavy, could you not-"

He gently pushed me away, and after a couple of minutes I got the hint and hopped off his chest. He pulled out a silk handkerchief and dabbed his face to get rid of the saliva. He had an expression halfway through disgust and endearment, and once he cleaned himself up, he bent down to scratch behind my still intact ear. "Good girl."

I had no idea how he could look at a huge wolf with a partially torn off ear, too many scars to count and dark, sad eyes, and see the most adorable creature in the galaxy, but I sure wasn't going to complain.

"Ready?"

I flattened my chest against the ground, hips raised high and wiggling slightly. My tail whipped the air, and I was acutely aware of saliva dripping from my tongue. All in all, I was a disgusting mess, and yet Nureyev was staring fondly at me.

"Catch!"

He threw the stick, and it disappeared in the distance. I immediately dashed after it, heart pounding while I ran as fast as I could. It didn't take me long to find it: I picked it up, holding it between my teeth without any fear of breaking it, and trotted back to Nureyev. The wave of pride overcoming me when he grinned at me and scratched me again made my tail spin like helicopter blades.

"Good girl. Again!"

He threw it once more, this time aiming for high rather than far. I jumped and caught it mid air, landing with a thud in front of him.

"Yes! That's it! Good girl!"

We kept going for hours, our supernatural bodies giving us the stamina we required to play far longer than a regular human and a regular wolf would have.

By the time I dropped the stick at his feet for the last time, I was panting more from exhaustion than excitement, and he was slowly massaging his shoulder. "What do you say, should we take a break?"

He didn't wait for my answer and sat down under a tree, stretching his legs in front of him. I circled around a bit before finally lying down, head resting on his lap. I closed my eyes as I felt cold, familiar hands scratching behind my ear and all over my head. "You're such a good girl, you know? I love you so much."

My tail was wagging much more slowly than before, given that I had already used much of my energy, but it didn't make me any less happy to be around him. After about half an hour of scratches, I flopped down on the ground, rolling over to expose my belly to him. I looked up at him with a pleading expression, and he laughed. "See? Why can't you be this nice to me as a human?" 

He ignored my growl at his words, and sat on his knees, starting to rub my belly with both hands. "And you don't even talk back. If it wasn't for the fact that you have the loveliest lips when you walk on two legs, I would almost prefer this version of you."

I didn't even reply: I made a mental note to pout at him later, and then my brain shut down, knowing only pets and Nureyev.

It was so relaxing, lying on the ground after a long session of playing catch, with him gently rubbing my belly, that I fell asleep. Nureyev must have moved me while I was unconscious, because I woke up lying fully on his lap, and he was absentmindedly scratching any bit of me he could reach.

"Well, hello, Juno. Chased many sewer rabbits, I see."

Chasing sewer rabbits is what he affectionately calls when my limbs twitch while I'm sleeping. I told him it was a humiliating phrase, but he saw that it makes me blush and wag my tail, so he keeps doing it.

"Do you want to spend some more time as a wolf?"

I answered by hopping off his lap and trotting towards the cloak, crawling under it. Once I stood up, human again, I fastened the clasps and stretched. "So you prefer me as a wolf because I don't talk?"

He sighed loudly and dramatically, patting his thighs with one hand. "The peace and quiet is over. Don't you want to howl a bit more?"

I growled at him, but still accepted his invitation and sat on his lap, arms wrapped around his neck as he scratched behind my ear. "I could ditch you right here and now, you know? Run away and find someone who actually appreciates me."

He chuckled lightly, leaving a quick peck on my lips. "No one could ever appreciate you the way I do, love. I've known you for centuries, and even I will never truly appreciate you the way you deserve."

I flushed and closed my eyes, resting my head on his shoulder. "Flattery won't save you, you know."

"Oh, so I can stop praising you?"

I growled, nuzzling against his neck. "Don't you dare."

He laughed and I reached up to lick his face once more. I scrunched my nose at a familiar, disgusting taste. "Ew, you're wearing make up."

"And you didn't notice earlier, when you coated my entire face with saliva?"

"I was busy, alright?" Still, I didn't let the taste of foundation stop me from going to town on his cheeks. He laughed, slipping his hands on my chest and pushing me away from him.

"Juno, there are ways to show affection that are equally as enthusiastic, but less... wet."

"Oh, like you don't like it." I grumbled, reluctantly pulling away as he cleaned his face up.

"Oh, I love it. Just like I love you, my sweet little doggy."

I playfully showed him my teeth, crossing my arms. "Do I look like a goddamn poodle to you?"

"Oh, not at all. You are far less aggressive, and much more obedient, too." His hands slid on my waist and pulled me closer, as he left a trail of soft kisses from my temple to the corner of my mouth. "A poodle would have already bitten me, but you're a good girl, aren't you? You would never hurt me."

"Don't bet on it." I muttered, sighing happily at his affection. I gave up on controlling my tail, and I let it wag freely. If Nureyev saw it and could figure out my emotions, well, so be it. "Shouldn't you be on your way? The Sun is about to rise."

"Oh, it's not like it will kill me. Being away from you is however highly deleterious to my health."

I tilted my head, in the way Nureyev always tells me reminds him of a confused golden retriever. "You could come to my house, you know? This way we can stay together and you won't be exposed to the Sun."

Nureyev grinned, flashing his sharp fangs in the meanwhile. I wish I could say it didn't make me swoon every single time, but I already lie to myself way too often. "Inviting me to your house? Very bold of you, Juno. Never thought we'd move past the holding hands stage."

"We literally are considering moving in together in the near future."

"Still, I think it's adorable." He kissed my forehead and gently shoved me off of him, standing up and taking extra care in patting away any sort of dirt from his clothes. "So, shall we-"

A leaf fell from the tree we were under, right on my nose, and before I could stop myself I barked at it. Loud.

Nureyev blinked twice, then burst into laughter. "What did that poor leaf do to you?"

I flushed, ears dropping as I stared to the ground in front of me. "I just got startled, okay?"

He lifted up my chin and smiled at me. "Don't be embarrassed. I think that's endearing! You're a cute little dog, and sometimes mean scary leaves can frighten you."

I groaned, turning around and walking away. "Bye, Nureyev."

"Juno, wait! Oh, don't be like this, I was complimenting you!"

He started jogging towards me, and an idea popped in my mind. I took off my cloak and threw it at him. Before I knew it, I was running again, leaves crunching under my paws as I flew across the forest, Nureyev right behind me.

It didn't even matter who was going to win. The adrenaline rush of the chase was enough to make my heart beat faster and my head light with excitement. Yes, running in the woods is magical, but running in the woods with Peter Nureyev is the closest thing to heaven anyone could think of.


End file.
